a new Begining, Bismillah....

Setelah sekian lama tidak aktif menulis blog ini, tepatnya sejak saya fokus untuk menyelesaikan skripsi saya. Inilah tulisan pertama saya di blog ini... Sederhana saja, saya ingin mengenang bagaimana perjuangan saya dalam menyelesaikan skripsi (yang dulu pernah saya tulis namun belum saya post di blog ini) kemudian saya ingin berterimakasih kepada kedua orang tua saya yang memberikan dukungan luar biasa kepada saya sampai saat ini.
And Officially ... I'm being a Bachelor of Education. This is for u two, Mama & Bapak...;)


Flash back, bagaimana sesuatu bernama SKRIPSI pernah membuat saya nyaris putus asa, begitu desperate...
steping up to d' 'upstream' ... (a story about d word : "SUCCESS" and my unfinish "SKRIPSI")

i was tidying up my Computer on my desk,
then I’m thinking…
talking to my self, deeply!!

“When it’ll be over,Rabb…”
“Enough for going to bed lately…”
“Enough for waking up with a very wroth feeling…”
“desperate Enough!!!”
“SKRIPSI is killing me softly…Crazy and whatever I call this uneasy feeling…”



Huuuffff… Suddenly thinking of one thing called “SUCCESS” : everone’s daily dream.
Then I Trying to remind a lot of advices that come into my head by somepeople who motivate me a lots and I want to say a very BIG THANKS for all of you, for everything u did, for all of your words, its such an UNSTOPPING motivation for me…
Trust me, I already wake up from that lower spirit … ^^

Let me to telling this story…
(Staring : My stupidity, My Mind, My Heart, d’ Dream, d’ memory, d’ advices which come into my head) …

There are a lot of things seems erroneous on my mind…
Oke, I have to motivate my self with a thousand words …
Then here I am…on the line I don’t know where exactly but ONE THING…
I realize that… Running with my unfinish SKRIPSI is a very BIG JOURNEY for me…
I’ll get more than a point, more than appreciation, more than just a title,,, And I Think…
it’ll be more than just something called EUPHORIA in my Graduation Day that I looking forwad to,,,it’ll be a very unforgettable BIG Feeling on my heart…then I call it “The START LINE”… One Step closer to the word, SUCCESS…
I often think of success as winning d' big game, But SKRIPSI tell me that success is much more than winning.
Success is about rising above mistakes, failures, hardships, heart aches, setbacks n pain…. Success is about pursuing what truly matters to you when others think you're a fool.
Success is about staying in front of the white board or book or everything u can learn from… and coming out on top AFTER others have doubted you, told you that you cannot make it, that you'll never succeed.

Success is about raising the volume of d' Inner Voice that believes in you and knows you can win and lowering the volume on the 'no can do' voice that only knows failure.
Success is about creating a bright vision that places your heart in flames of fire.
Success is about feeling, deep down in your gut that you are on d' right way ,even if it is difficult. It is about sticking with your objective even when times are tough.
Success is about moving away from a zone of comfort and into a zone where time doesn't exist. Success is more about d' journey of becoming than d' fulfillment of a goal.
Success is understanding that after you accomplish a goal, your brain looks for another and if you don't give it one, peace of mind ceases to exist.
Success is about figuring out a way to win by rising above circumstances.

Today, you are a success when you decide to be BIGGER than your problems, heartaches and mistakes, when you figure out a way to bring your BIG SELF to d' FUTURE
So... I Turn on my Computer…
Open my SKRIPSI folder…
Optimisticly regard my SKRIPSI…
Wishing that I can do the best for this lil’ part of d journey to the word : SUCCESS.
InsyaAllah,,,
Come on ie, it’s just a little part of the worlds…
BISMILLAH…
(Thank you Allah, I quite LOVE YOU..^^)

and now...
the S.Pd in stand beside my name,,,
it's just an ordinary thing...nothing special...title just a title...
The special one that the smiles of my parents's face on that day...
Oh Ma...Pak...I really really LOVE YOU!!!

and this is for you both...

^^(D words from my deepest heart...With BIG LOVE...for My Lovely Parents)^^

Dear, Mama-Bapak...
A lil' bit rain in the morning...
In the corner of this room,,,
I feel crazy in missing you both!!!!
Missing the breakfast with you all in our homeweethome!!!
Ma...Pak... Having a Parents like you while growing up was the greatest gift that anyone could ever have given me...
Its just because of the confidence and values that you instilled in me that made me who I am today...
Thank you for shaping me into a person who I like and am proud to be...
Thank you for letting me believe that I could be whoever I wanted to be, do whatever I wanted to do, there were no limitations except my drive, ambition and creativity...

Ma...
Thank you for your unwavering support through out my journey...
Thank you for trying to read all the books that I read,,,
Thank you for holding my hand when I was broken heart and for crying with me afterwards... Thank you for always having hope for me when I didn’t have for myself...
Thank you for telling me not to give up when I said I couldn’t do it any more...
Thank you for never giving up on me when I went through that dark period, when I shut every one out of my life. When loving me must have been like trying to hold a cactus.
Thank you for loving me through all of my rejections of help and love...
Thank you for always sending me the SMS on my black day and trying to calming me down.. Thank you Ma, that message helped me so much...
Thank you for mediating in the relationship with Mas and Ade,
I know it must be very hard for you to be stuck in the middle of the tension that was between us. Thank you for never taking sides, for being there for three of us equally, for being the perfect mother and being the perfect mother and pillar for us...
Thank you for having my picture in your wallet...
Thank you, for every thing you have done for me, thank you for every thing you have said, and for all the times when you said nothing and just listened.
Thank you for being such a wonderful mother for me, Mas and ade...

Pak...
it’s hardly enough for what you do and what you have done for me and our lovely family. personally,,,, you have taught me, ,, You taught me to work hard and enjoy diz life as you have done... You taught me the price of honesty and that it cannot be negotiated... You taught me about life through your own experiences… ThanX Pak!!!
That means more than A LOT for me, Mas and Ade!!!
When I was a child, we would have milk together,,, in the mornings, while you read the paper...
I would share my thoughts and the dream I just had, and the most lovely memory I have had was that you always listened... You asked me about my favorite cartoons and enjoyed my stories of wonderful fantasy…
thanx Pak...for teaching me how to appreciate others... When I grew up, you were stern when you needed to be,,, but mostly loving because you knew that would be the most important way to get through to me... Never once did I not feel your love, even when you were angry...
Thanx pak...for letting me know what is the consequences of the defaults... And now, that I have grown, I remember the mornings we have had together and the many more mornings we will share... Although, the milk has been replaced with coffee for you,,, the most important thing has not, and that our relationship, our communication, and our talks, these remain the same…
Thanx Pak for always be My bestfriend,,,for let me to show you everything that you never know without looking down to me...for show me everything that I never know patiently...
Thank Pak for teaching how to comunicate with others...
I love you my dearest Bapak… “I love you more than the words I can say... ”

Thank you thank you thank you Ma...Pak... For a million things, for everything!!! I don’t know what I would do without you both...
There are so many many more things, small things, big things you gave to me...













Thank you Ma...Pak, I love you both , more than words can ever express...
I LOVE YOU BOTH

and this is for you two my naughty boys...











I LOVE YOU BOTH dear Ririh and Wafit ...

-KISSESS-

* Semoga cinta kasih yang mengalir dari kalian semakin menguatkan langkah saya untuk menapaki hari-hari saya di depan sana yang pasti akan jauh lebih berat dari kemarin...
I'll do my best, of course for u all...;D